Well, I am now officially three days into the Insanity Max 30 program.  I am feeling really good about my workouts and nutrition - although I am still working on trying to limit the amount of sugar I consume (specifically sugar in fruit).  I've been good at limiting unnecessary/unhealthy carbohydrates and eating adequate protein.  I've also been doing a Shakeology shake each day... which I can honestly say I am really enjoying and do feel is making a difference.  I really look forward to the shake each day, I notice I crave it and it does seem to be helping with my energy and sugar cravings.

As for the workouts... whoo wheeee!!!  They are great.  Yesterday I completed Tabata and I also did a long walk with my family.  Today I did Sweat Intervals (and was completely soaked after), did the Ab Max workout and did a long walk.  I can say that I am feeling it... although not so much that I can't walk.  Today was the first day I was able to complete a few of the exercises non-modified, not for the entire time, but here and there.  It will be a journey and process.  I am anxious to see how I progress over the next few weeks and hopeful that my next progress check (with photos and measurements, etc) shows improvement and serves as motivation.  I'm sure that improvement is happening because I can tell in my pajama pants (which I happen to spend a considerable about of time in while I am on maternity leave).  The workouts have really helped my mental outlook also.  They have however, left me very tired by about 5:30.  I know my body will continue to adjust, right now I just take it for the fact that I am working my body.

I am hoping to maintain this balance because I notice how much healthier I am mentally when I am eating better and working out.  I know I need to be patient to see the physical progress as well and know it will come with consistency.  I already feel better in my skin.  I am anxious to see how much better I will feel even a month from now when we go on vacation!

Today marked the first official day of the new challenge I started (Insanity Max 30).  I have tried a couple of the wrkts late last week so I had a small taste of what was coming but today marked the first official day.  The program consists of 30 minute workouts 6 days/wk.  No equipment necessary, just your body weight.  Lot of plyometric type moves - I have been doing the entire workouts modified because I am 1.) out of shape 2.) overweight.  These modified workouts are still amazingly difficult and leave me feeling "workout satisfied" after them.  Today we did the Cardio Challenge workout, I can already tell the improvements I've made in the couple of weeks I've started working out.

I did notice that I am feeling pretty tired right about now.  I am guessing that much of that has to do with the fact that I am also watching my food intake and trying to cut down on sugar.  I think feeling tired is my body adjusting to the new style of eating and also trying to find a good equilibrium to settle into where I don't feel super tired/hungry but also don't overeat.  It will take some adjusting to.  I am curious to see how a full week of workouts will feel, how my body will adjust, etc.

In addition to this new challenge I learned of some things that have been going on at work, things that could ultimately impact me and my workload.  I am not going to go into details but what I will say is that I recognize this is a good time to continue to test my faith and commitment to my family and my health.  Something that I will need to maintain a focus on as I return to work (which isn't for several more weeks but I really need to be able to have good boundaries before going back).

More to come on all of this... hoping to get a good nights rest as I am feeling like I need it!  Hopefully Harper agrees that a good nights rest is a good idea :)

What a weird title for a post that came out of no where.  Yes, I know... I've been gone for a long while.  BUT - I am back now, at least temporarily.  I am coming back to my blog because it sort of represents a place where an interesting journey began for me.  One where I documented a mental break through in physical achievement I had not experienced yet.  And although this was years ago, I find that it is just the reminder and motivation I need to begin documenting my journey yet again.

So, a lot has happened over a couple of years.  I won't bore this post with the details but I'd say the notable change worth mentioning is that I had a baby.  Yep, a baby. One of those miniature versions of yourself that sends you to the brink of exhaustion like you've never experienced.  Granted, this was a welcome addition (actually a begged for addition) and we are loving life with our new little girl, Harper (who is snuggled into my chest as I type this).  At just over two months I am finally feeling as if I have emerged from the fog of the newborn black hole that you can not even begin to understand until you've experienced it.  SO.MUCH.RESPECT.FOR.MOTHERS.  Holy moly is raising a baby a test of your willpower, patience, etc.  I now understand what all new mothers mean when they say "it's a lot of work".  I also know what they mean when they say "but its totally worth it and it's the best thing in the world to be a mom".

You may be reading this and wondering why I have arrived back on this blog and what I will be writing about now.  Well, I need an outlet.  I've been off work for two months and have another two to go.  I want to capture my thoughts and journey somewhere.  Naturally, this is a good place for me.  In addition, I am venturing on a new wellbeing journey and think it is exciting to continue my story from the same place I began to document it.  I am not sure if anyone will read this and that's ok.  I realize that most likely no one cares about my trials and tribulations like I do but I need this for me.  I'd like to document my new journey as a mother but also my new journey adjusting to my new body and regaining some of what was lost through pregnancy (actually, I shouldn't try and fool you... much of it was lost long before pregnancy, for a plethora of reasons... of which will most likely become intertwined in future posts).

For this first official post I'd like to declare that my baby put me on a diet.  What the heck does that even mean you ask?  Well, aside from the obvious that most all new moms feel (the need to loose the baby weight) I've found that breastfeeding a baby can result in mom going on a diet herself.  At least, I would assume this to be true of any mother who wants the best for her baby after finding out the baby's comfort could be improved through nutritional shifts by the mother.  I've learned that Harper is sensitive to some foods I eat, most notably dairy.  So, for starters... this boob buffet is going dairy free.  Honestly, she's doing both of us a favor by forcing this on us.  Mom needs to learn to cut down on the cheese and yogurt, etc.  She's also forced mom to pay much closer attention to the quality of foods consumed.  These behaviors presumably will lead to improved health and the sibling of improved health, better physique.  That's my round about way of declaring that I need to loose weight.  My nutritional habits will be part of this journey, first starting with removal of dairy, unnecessary sugars and increasing the amount of healthy protein and vegetables consumed.  Let me be clear here though... removing sugars from my diet will leave me sucking my thumb curled up in a ball crying on the floor in the corner.  I love me some sweet treats, and yet I know and understand that sugar is my enemy.  This is true for a number of reasons but one of the biggest is because I was diagnosed with PCOS a little over a year ago (more on that later).

Secondary to food, I'd like to declare that I am re-instating physical activity.  Partly, for the benefits of weight loss (a girl don't need to deny this being a big motivation) but also because it feels good to move my body again - well sorta.  Right now it feels a bit more like a hippo trudging through concrete but I know it will feel better again soon.  I also need to regain a regular physical activity schedule as a stress outlet.  If there is one thing I know intimately about myself it is that I am a much happier/productive/loving person if I am working out regularly.  This will be critical as I prepare to go back to work, which can be very high stress most days (don't get me wrong, I am blessed to have made an amazing career shift in the past couple of years but along that way I've lost a bit of myself and my regular schedule of working out).  Can I also mention that working out is something I recognize will help me be a better mother?  I recognize that my health and happiness are more critical now more than ever for the future of my daughter.  Amazing, how that transformation can take place in your mind nearly overnight.  So, don't be hatin' on my assuming this is some New Years resolution.  Timing may be suspect but this is more of a New Life resolution, for my new life as a mother and to accommodate the things I have learned to be true of my needs so that I can ensure that I am a great mother for years to come.

So, where does this leave me now?  You want details of what I am going to do about this?  I decided to take "before" photos... if I muster up the courage I will post them but not just yet.  In addition, I have weighed myself and taken circumference measurements.   Documenting all of this is critical for me to find ways to capture success.  I have slowly been modifying my diet over the past few weeks and will continue to do that in the coming weeks.  Much will be discussed related to dietary habits/recipes, etc.  I am also going to be completing the new Insanity Max 30 workout program, which is 60 days long.  Perfect timing to be just wrapping up when I return to work.  That hell inflicted journey starts Monday.  I've already tried a few of the workout DVDs and have done a few other workouts with my friend Emily (yep, the same gal I spoke of years ago).  She's a rockstar friend, true support system and amazing motivation (she herself has battled PCOS and looks and feels better than ever after two kids).  The initiation into working out has been good - for once in my life I've been easing my way into something.  Totally not my style, however, I know I need to be careful and want to ensure sustainability.  These workouts are the one thing I feel I can do completely for myself and I don't want to jeoporadize that joy.  Don't get me wrong though, even the "easing into" I've done has left me sore.  In fact, I sit here typing this with a tore up booty from a class that I took from Emily earlier this morning.  My whole body has been sore for a little over a week and I know that ain't going away considering I'm doing the entire DVD completely modified - thus, I've got lots of capacity to continue adapting to.    

So there you have it... the rest of the details will be forthcoming in future posts and historical details will be intertwined in those posts as well.  I don't want to bore you with all that here and now and besides my carpel tunnel is flaring up and I don't feel like typing much more at this point.  Signing off... until next time.