Its been a long long while since my fingers have danced over my keyboard to create a post on here. I have actually wanted to make a post for quite some time, but for one reason or another just decided not to. I feel like I need to catch up with a long lost friend, its gonna take some time to rekindle the flame... but today marks the day that I try to resurrect my relationship with my blog. Maybe I am actually feeling like my old self, just maybe. My old self, the one who would stay up late with twinkling eyes looking into the computer screen as I poured my thoughts, emotions and humility out with a blog post. The "old" me was a good me and for some reason I've haven't truly felt like the "old" me in a long time. Lately I have gotten glimmers that the old me was back, that the old me was peeling back the layers of this "recent" me. These moments of the "old" me are seeming to happen more and more frequently, this is something I like.

I guess it's time to get reacquainted. How do I start by outlining why my life has gotten so crazy? Well, let me summarize it for you (some of this has been blogged about before);

• Ruby, my dear black lab/best friend, lost her life to cancer a little over a year ago


• We sold our house


• We moved in with my grandparents for 6 months


• We built a new beautiful house


• TJ became and Engineer for the railroad


• I trained for and competed in my first Ironman Triathlon


• I got in a really bad bicycle accident that could have killed me or left me paralyzed

So, as you can see, lots has happened (I've left lots of little things out too, so I don't bore you with the details). The main thing that has been the struggle over the past several months has been recovering from my accident. I really did a number on myself. I've spent months trying to rehab two broken vertebrae, five broken ribs, a dislocated rib, a shifted sternum, a separated AC joint, both lungs being punctured, bruised internal organs, and torn muscles and tendons in my back. As you can imagine, this has been trying. Trying, not just physically but mentally and emotionally. The pain has been unimaginable, the headaches haunting. As of late I am actually doing much better as I have been working with a new doctor who has done wonders for me. She has been my partner in "operation regain control". I honestly felt like my identity was lost as I found myself in a pattern of hourly pain management each day. I understand those who fall into that chronic pain cycle and how utterly exhausting it is. Luckily, I have started to break free. I AM regaining control (something I tend to like to have over my life). I have been able to start working out over the past several weeks and I am regaining control over the pain, my sleep and my diet. For months on end I didn't get sleep, the only sleep I was able to get was the kind where you are in a pain killer induced sleep coma, which isn't quite healthy or rejuvenating.

However, I now have more control. I've really enjoyed getting back in my rhythm. I feel like I am making a positive difference in my health again and that feeling is something I don't ever want to loose again. Blogging is a great way to document my journey and thus you find me back here ...